I almost forgot I had this blog!

So with the new year approaching in about 9 hours, something got me to take a look at my previous blogs to do some retroactive reflections.

2007 was definitely a crazy year. I probably did some of the STUPIDEST things I've ever done in my life but I (hopefully) also learned some of the most poignant lessons. I've also been blessed with some awesome opportunities: PwC, Barkada presidency, to name a couple.

With the exception of Uncle Carl's mild stroke last week, the family's been pretty healthy. Yeah, an accident here or there, but no one really got hurt. Thank God!

People-wise... There are definitely some great new people in my life that I could learn a lot from and make a lot of memories with. Other friends have been distanced and definitely some I thought I'd be able to depend on... well, let's just say I don't anymore. It was great to catch up w/ some old friends, though (Gift Exchange 2007 & Random Glendale Party)! I still need to spend some quality time w/ other strangers.

Evaluating how well I did on the two things I mentioned last year...

• "Be more aware of myself, my surroundings, others, and hopefully, others wants/needs." Wow. I definitely lost sight of that goal. I have done a slightly better job this year than previously, though. I still tend to wander through life once in a while, not quite sure of what's going on or what has been said. I do try to be more conscious of others'; I just haven't done much about it... or at least as much as I probably could have.
  
• "Do what I say." Yes and no.
• The other night even though it was a b*tch to get there, I went to bMod's performance @ Avalon. I ended up getting there after the guest list had closed so
  it ended up being $20 instead of $10. Yikes! Parking there is also a bastard, so I had to shell out $25 for parking... all by my lonesome cuz I couldn't find someone to go w/ me. All cuz I said I'd be there. I ended up having fun, though, and my presence was appreciated so... all smiles afterward! (=
  
• There's quite a lot that I had planned to do, though, that still hasn't been done (i.e. lose weight!) so this will probably stick around for next year's list.

Speaking of which... I haven't really made my list of resolutions yet so I guess I'll be doing that now.

• Do what I say.
• Integrity!
• Stick to goals.
  
• Be more aware of others/my surroundings and act on that knowledge.
• from watching what I say to watching the road...
  
• Enjoy life.
• Have a positive/optimistic attitude.
• Make the most of each moment... don't just wait for it to be over.
• Have fun!!! <-- believe it or not, this is really hard for me to do. hahah.
  
• Spend quality time with the important people in my life.
• Pat
• Family (cousins, immediate family, lola & lolo, etc)
• High school friends
• Barkada members
• Cute-E-board
  
• Take care of myself...
• physically: exercise, diet, sleeping habits, posture, etc.
• financially: working more, saving more, not splurging, investing?
• emotionally: confide in others and probably blog more.
• mentally: READ! challenge myself
  

Hahah! I just realized my resolutions thus far spell... D-BEST! 2008 will be D-BEST year ever! lol. It actually might be:

• turning 21
• graduating
• working!!!

And of course I'll have bajillion Barkada events to plan & experience, time spent w/ Pat, the family, and friends.

Sweet. Can't wait for oh-eight!

Aspirations

As a president, I want my own strengths to resurface: organization, structure, dependability, dedication to quality. I want the levelheadedness, privacy, and work ethic of Mike Pedro and I want passion, character, friendliness...

As a human, I need to learn lessons:

• STRIVE.
• It's not what happens to you; it's what you do afterward that defines you.
• Always do the right thing.
• Give people the benefit of the doubt--especially when you know them.
• Even when people don't deserve it, be compassionate and, at the very least, friendly.
• Feel. In order to live life, you've got to feel things, whether it's happiness, pain, anger, or confusion.
• Be uncomfortable. It's only then when we can really grow.
• The world is a fufcked up place, so it's on us to make it better.
• Family is important. Family is important. Family is important.
• Take care of yourself; that includes your actual body.
• There's a reason and purpose for everything that happens.
  

I know I have a lot to work on, but I'm gonna try to develop my potential. To me, taking on Barkada is the best opportunity for growth. Some areas to improve upon: motivation, communication, decision making, composure.

Side note: if I am elected president, Barkada will be my boyfriend.

Key elements I want to stress:

• academics
• culture
• social
• sports
• alumni
• philanthropy
• support/teamwork
• communication
• growth as individuals
• interpersonal relations

The keynote speaker at yesterday's Golden Key induction was pretty good. I don't know why it took him to convince me. Don't settle for mediocrity. Be a leader.

good times

I know that in corporate world I said that I wasn't scared of the "real world" and life as a full-time employee, but as another year comes to an end, I keep thinking about how much I'm gonna miss college.

I hope I don't treat it like high school; I wanna come back and visit as much as possible.

College has been an awesome experience. Hands down the best years of my life thus far. Growth, education, and fun.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

8 quarters down, 1 in progress, and 3 more to go...

girls vs. women (taken from jowee)

Girls leave their schedule wide-open and wait for a guy to call and make plans.
Grown women make their own plans and nicely tell the guy to get in where he fits in.

Girls want to control the man in their life.
Grown women know that if he is truly hers, he doesn't need controlling.

Girls check you for not calling them.
Grown women are too busy to realize you hadn't.

Girls try to put a man 'on lock' by using sex.
Grown women know that it is the sex of the mental kind that makes a man want to lock YOU down.

Girls fake-moan, lay there and take the jabbing.
Grown women say, "just stop", get up, get dressed and walk out.

Girls are afraid to be alone.
Grown women revel in it-- using it as a time for personal growth.

Girls ignore the good guys.
Grown women ignore the bad guys.

Girls make you come.
Grown women make you come home.

Girls worry about not being pretty and/or good enough for their man.
Grown women know that they are pretty and/or good enough for any man.

Girls try to monopolize all their man's time (i.e, don't want him to have "guy time".)
Grown women realize that a lil' bit of space makes the 'together time' even more special -- and goes to hang out with her own friends!

Girls think a guy who cries is weak.
Grown women offer their shoulder and a tissue.

Girls want to be spoiled and 'tell' their man so.
Grown women 'show' him and make him comfortable enough to reciprocate w/o fear of losing his 'manhood'.

Girls get hurt by one man and make all men pay for it.
Grown women know that that was just one man.

Girls fall in love, chase aimlessly after the object of their affection, ignoring all 'signs'.
Grown women know that sometimes the one you love, don't always love you back -- and move on, without bitterness.

Girls will read this and get an attitude.
Grown women will read this and pass it on to other women!!

everything changes

So tomorrow is Alumni Sabbath at San Gabriel Academy (SGA) [crappy website, though]. I attended SGA for my entire high school career. I met a lot of awesome people and learned a lot (probably more things not related to academia). There was drama and there were good times. I loved high school.













But I haven't really been back since I left.

It's gonna be weird walking back on-campus. I know it's only been three years, but I feel like I've changed so much, especially over this past year. Comparing my life now to how it was before... so much has changed. My circle of friends, my opinions, my accomplishments, my awareness of culture...

Cal Poly Pomona has been a great choice. Sometimes I wonder (and I've also been asked), what am I doing at CPP? I probably could've gone somewhere else... maybe some place more prestigious. But hey, the choice has been made and I've done what I could with it.

It's crazy to think that in a year I'll be starting my last quarter of college.

Next year itself is gonna be weird with all the dinosaurs graduating...

Damn.

I've had the luxury of having others stick around; until now I've still had older people to look up to in Barkada. There will still be some next year, but it's just weird to think that I'll be one of the higher ups now...

Anyhoooo. I think I totally got off topic.

Point: things change. Hopefully people can deal with it.

lesson

Everyone has good and not so good parts to them. Acknowledge that and deal with it. Don't dwell on the bad parts. Try to work through those differences to appreciate the good they do have.

Spring Quarter 2007

It looks like it's gonna be a good quarter!!!

• Managerial Statistics (TOM 302) - hybrid class (only meets Wednesdays instead of both Mondays & Wednesdays); cool teacher; online quizzes; tests on how to use statistic software
• Interactive Marketing (IBM 326) - a bit scary (50% of our grade is a group project!), but definitely interesting; cool teacher; toward the end of the quarter, we won't have class meetings, only group meetings
  
• Intro to Ethnic Studies (EWS 140) - cool teacher (Barkada's very own advisor!); a lot of writing, but interesting subject; no class this Thursday; group project on a community
  
• Data Modeling (CIS 345) - a lot of people say she's a crazy teacher, but she's not that bad; interesting subject; option to work individually or in a pair (i'm opting to work alone) for the projects in which we reverse engineer a data model for a website; no class 5/29

For the most part, each class is interesting, has a cool teacher, or both! It's gonna be a bit demanding. I hope I can put more effort into this quarter than I did with last quarter. ::crosses fingers::

gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Sometimes, some people piss you off the instant you start talking to them.

s;ldkfjakfdj;kjsfd;ljdsf;ljdsf;lksdjf;lksjdf;lkjdslfkja;ldskfj;kjdsf;lkjdsf

I Just CAIN'T Give Up Now!

Thank You for Smoking

Thank You for Smoking

I can't wait until Netflix sends this!!!

Great Moments in Spin

• "If the gloves don't fit, you must acquit." --Johnny Cochran
• "My band played the wrong song." --Ashlee Simpson
• "But I didn't inhale." --Bill Clinton
• "It's what I would call a terrorist surveillance program." --George W. Bush
• "It was a wardrobe malfunction." --Janet Jackson
  

feelings

I already feel like Spring Quarter 2007's gonna be another "I can't wait until this quarter's over!" Quarter... T=

I'm gonna be HELLA chill till Monday.

gold

taken from http://spoolman.com/sdaeop4/truecolors.html

My True Color Is Gold

I am institution oriented. I perform well in structure.

I do my best when the task is structured and clearly defined. My routines are well structured. I want to know when I am on the right track. Rules and directions are a great help.

At work. I provide stability and can maintain organization. My ability to handle details and to work hard make me the backbone of many organizations. I believe that work comes before play, even if I must work overtime to complete the job.

In love. I am serious and tend to have a traditional, conservative view of both love and marriage. I want a mate who can work along with me, building a secure, predictable life together. I demonstrate love and affection through the practical things I do for my loved ones.

In childhood. I wanted to follow the rules and regulations of the school. I understood and respected authority and was comfortable with academic routine. I was the easiest of all types of children to adapt to the educational system.

Things That Cause Stress To Gold

• Inefficiency
• Lack of order
• Flaky people
• Unreliable people
• People who are late
• Lack of leadership
• Non-cooperation
• Not knowing what to expect
• Slobs
• Procrastinators
• Waiting
• Loud people
• Disorganized people

Gold may see self as:

• Stable
• Providing security
• Dependable
• Firm
• Always have a view
• Efficient
• Realistic
• Decisive
• Executive type
• Good planner
• Orderly, neat
• Organized person
• Dependable
• Punctual, expects same
• Goal oriented
• Finish what I start
• Good at sorting, weeding out

Others may see Gold as:

• Rigid
• Controlling
• Dull, boring
• Stubborn, pigheaded
• Opinionated
• System-bound
• Unimaginative
• Judgmental
• Bossy, controlling
• Limiting flexibility
• Uptight
• Sets own agenda
• Predictable
• Rigid idea of time
• End justifies the means
• Limited, not able to do many things at once
• Throws away good items needlessly

-------------------
GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

corporate world

Wherever I turn people seem to dread the 9 to 5. Yes, it may be tough work, but hey, that's life. What would the world be like without the daily grind?

I guess I'm weird cuz I'm not afraid of the "real world." Sure commuting might be a hassle and I wish hours could be more flexible, but dude; you're running the world.

Compare sitting on your ass all day to developing a system that allows its users to improve their business's performance. Imagine being behind the technology that allows Wal-Mart to restock their shelves practically instantaneously. Imagine figuring the best way to get UPS packages across 200+ countries. Imagine coming up with Google's newest innovation.

Allright, so maybe not everyone gets to do that in their normal day job but everyone contributes to society in some way, right? We all need to adhere to deadlines and policies. Those who don't... well... I don't know what to say about them.

Let's reevaluate this blog in a couple of years when I've been working for a few months.

learning experiences

So far 2007 has been quite the challenge. However, I hope to take away some key lessons from this.

• I'm human and everyone else is human, too. Things don't always have to be perfect, but I'm still going to strive for that. But when things don't quite come out as I expect, I gotta look at the brighter side of things, try to see what did work, and find out how things can be improved the next time.
• Budget for extra time. I'm the type that likes to plan out everything; just take a look at my Google Calendars. However, people (especially myself) lag. Allow for extra time for crap that comes up so that I won't always be late. Also, make some time to have fun.
• Listen. This world is full of miscommunication. Try to be patient and take the time to understand others before jumping to conclusions, getting mad, etc. whenever possible. Remember that people think differently and see things differently.
• Prioritize. I need to remember what's really important. Look at the big picture.
• How will I know limits from lies if I never try? I've known this ever since Thrice came out with TAITA, but there are always new ways in which that phrase becomes evident. Just try it. See what works and what doesn't. See what people have to offer.
• Relax, ka muna. Take some time to chill. Kinda similar to what I said earlier, but really, sometimes, take some time to chill.
• Spend time with friends. Friendship is important. I have some really awesome friends. I don't make enough time to chillax with them or just talk to them.

All for now. Just a sampling...

it was bound to happen sooner or later

Bi+ch!

tired

I can't wait for this to be over.

Good news and bad news.

Decisions!

What I really want: sleep.

alumni banquet

Yay! It's finally over!!!

It was a pretty awesome event. Could've gone a bit better if I paid more attention to the advice I was given and just double checked on everything. All in all, though, it was freakin' great!

There are still some follow-up things to do, but hopefully those won't take too long.

Just wanted to share some of the awesome things people shared:

"Continue the alumni events/banquet. This is the only time I come out and see my friends from the days! I love it! You can always count on alumni for help --> cause we were once in your shoes!! Good luck!"

"Barkada is so great thanks to its alumni!!! Thanks for everything. I love Barkada!!"

"Thank you Barkada for planning all this! You guys are awesome! K.I.T. Don't eva change! TCCIC"

"You have made my dream come true tonight. Thank you from the bottom of my heart."

"Great job with the alumni banquet. Good luck with a glorious future in Barkada."

"Hello Barkada! I miss it a lot. Take cares!"

"I <3 Barkada!"

"I heart barkada too! All your alumni are proud of you. Congrats on all your good work."

Sweet! The hard work finally pays off. (=

Btw, got offered the internship from PwC!

work

Recently, I've been getting excited about career opportunities. I know they're just opportunities right now and I won't have any real choices until all the interviewing is done, but woooow! So many choices!

And the marketing/HR people are doing an awesome job of selling their companies! Each time I read about a company, I seem to learn something new about them that makes me want to work for them.

Example: PricewaterhouseCoopers. I was initially turned off by the fact that they're a Big 4 company. I heard that they work their people to death and since it's a large company, it feels like a large company. After learning more about myself, though, and finding out more about PwC from people I've met and their website, it really doesn't seem that bad.

• They're big on recognizing your individuality and lifestyle. They have a bunch of profiles online about employees and their hobbies. They tell people to bring their lives with them when they come to work.
• That stems from their appreciation of diversity. Being a female minority in Southern California, diversity is really important to me. Not only for the fact that equal op companies would even consider me, but also for the fact that a more diverse group has the potential to do more. Everyone's background is unique and each person can add something to the group.
• Hard work. Okay, so I was worried about being overworked. They stress WorkLife balance a lot but keep reiterating that there will be some challenging work. But you know what? That's natural for me. I'm always overworking myself anyway. Haha.
• Learning opportunities. They're a freakin' huuuuuuuuge company. They have a lot of resources (money and people) to support learning whether it's on the job or formal training. I learned so much with Hitachi last summer; I hope to learn even more this summer.
• Awesome people. I want to work somewhere with quality people. Not just unique people, but people who work just as hard or harder than I do; people who are smarter than me, wiser than me. I want to be surrounded by people I can learn from. Well, it'd be great if they could be approachable, as well. PwC has a lot of applicants, so if you get in, you've got to be good. Also, PwC pairs interns up with mentors to help you learn the ropes.
• Clients. Not sure how much interaction with clients the internship will involve, but here's a list of some of the LA office's clients: Disney, Toyota, Sony, Farmers Insurance, Lakers, Activision, Academy of Motion Pictures

But let's not get our hopes up.

fortune

Aside from a business magazine that I'm currently subscribing to for free (thanks, BGS!), "fortune" is a word commonly followed by "cookie."

Since I've been getting a lot that seem to relate to me rather frequently, I plan to make a fortune cookie book. It'll be like a scrapbook, but probably just have the fortune at the top of the page followed by a reflection. Okay, so that's more of a journal, but whatever.

Fortunes I've received:

• If you want something, you must earn it.
• You are the life of any party. (I actually ended up giving that one to Russell.)
• Time, once lost, can never be regained. (The fortune that got me to start this project.)
• You will exceed even your own expectations.
• You will travel far and wide.
• You will always be surrounded by true friends. (riiight.)
• Opportunities abound to enhance your career. Choose wisely. (This one's old but totally relevant right now!)
• Speak less of your plans--you will get more of them done. (Definitely useful right now.)
• There is yet time enough for you to take a different path. (Very useful last year.)
• Your dearest wish will come true.
• You will be fortunate in everything you put your hands on.
• You savor the challenge of satisfying your high goals. (Is that really a fortune?)
• You will soon have the opportunity to improve your finances.
• A friend will soon bring you a gift. (Received 2/14/07)
• A friend will be important to you and your forthcoming success.
• You have an accurate and professional mind.
• Use your natural talents to obtain more.

Wow. I didn't realize how many I had.

In light of fortunate things, I leave you with "Fortunate Circumstance" by Lythium.

fufck

i can't do this by myself.

...

drunkards have their alcohol.
smokers have their cigs.
hardcore Christians have God.

the rest of us have...?

sometimes

you wonder why you do the things you do
you wonder why you spend time with the people you're with
you wonder who really cares
you wonder why you waste time
you wonder why you take the time out of your busy schedule to try to actually feel something only to feel something not that great and wish you just stayed in that cycle of a numb & busy life...

...

thanks.

you better shape up

feeling moody

I'm not quite sure what's wrong w/ me, but I've been feeling hella emotional lately. sldfjdsf!

Side note: I don't think girls will ever be satisfied with guys' reactions post break ups. If they mope, they're weaksauce; if they don't care, they're jerks.

Differences...

Dancing Through Life...

Oddly enough... as uncomfortable as I feel dancing, I feel like that's what's happening. Right now I feel like I'm just floating through waiting for the next big event... constantly looking forward to what's coming up.

I don't like it.

I hate the feeling of looking forward to something, feeling the excitement and expectations build up only to be disappointed.

[/pessimism?]

It was a long weekend. Did it go as I expected it to? Not quite. Didn't accomplish nearly as much hw as I had planned, didn't make the phone calls I planned to make, didn't achieve legendary status in much...

I don't like blogging just to complain, though, but I guess I'm still complaining cuz my epiphany hasn't struck me yet.

It was a long weekend. It was a good break from the busy-ness of my everyday life, yet it still felt so empty.

What's the point of doing something if you're just waiting for it to be over?

Maybe I'm just lacking the proper dosage of psychatude.



There ya go. [HIMYM season 01 ep 11]

camera

congratulations!
you are now...

...on camera.
in the shoes you chose
now everyone knows
who you are
what you look like
what you do
and it's captured
etched into eyes
ingrained into minds

like it or not
that's how it is

the spotlight shines

all eyes on you

the big things
the little things

save a life
snap a neck

who are you in their eyes?
the one to push them away?
or the one to draw them in?
walk across the room

people are different
but how will you deal with that

you are now ...?

gender reversal

Sometimes guys can act like girls.

Sometimes girls can be men.

No, I'm not talking about transvestites or sex changes.

Point: Be a "man" and handle your sh*t.

new

Hello 2007!

So 2006 was definitely a new year. New hair cuts, new responsibilities, new boyfriend, new internship, new experiences, new drama... There were gains--new phone, new car--yet also losses--lost phone, crashed car. All in all, it was one heck of a year.

It went by so quickly.

I've definitely changed a lot in the past year; hopefully I've grown in a better direction. This year, I definitely hope to grow into the person I want to be. I know that sounds generic, but I hope to make a more conscious effort to do so. Too many times I haven't been aware of myself or my actions. So this year, I want to be more aware of myself, my surroundings, others, and hopefully, others wants/needs. ::phew::

Another thing that I know is totally gonna kick my ass: do what I say. Many times I say I'll do this, I'll do that. Not often enough do I follow through on that. There are a lot of ambitious people out there (not that I count myself among them) but many times those ambitions aren't realized. This resolution hopefully gets me to 1. be more careful about what I say and 2. make sure I do what I say. Integrity. That is definitely a loaded word.

This is the year. Filled with new optimism, some ambition, and drive, I can totally do. Do what? Anything. Well, not anything, but what I need/want to accomplish is totally doable. I just need the push. How will I know limits from lies if I never try, right? It's doable.

This is the year to be Ted. No, not the Ted that plans out everything and over-thinks all the time. This is the year to be the Ted that does. "Jump off the ledge." Get the purple giraffe.